Christmas Season

Warning!! Super long post.... sorry! I understand if you don't want to read the whole thing :)

THIS IS THE ONLY PICTURE OF CHRISTMAS WE TOOK!! We got video, but other than that this is it! This was Christmas morning and my sister took it for us!! Yes, we are VERY LAME!!

I just don't understand why my life has seemed so out of whack lately! I had a really hard time enjoying the Christmas season this year. I finished school, but was completely behind on everything!!! So, I had two weeks to get caught up on everything, and I just felt like as I was trying to get anything done, a million and two things would pile themselves on my plate. The whole time I just wanted to sit down and watch a Christmas movie with my kids, or read a Christmas book. But, everytime I thought about doing something like that, another thing would come up that needed to be done. It was like an endless battle of trying to play catch up.

It seemed like we had get together after get together, event after event, place after place to go, and after each one I just felt more overwhelmed and we would be driving home, and I would tell Jon that I just felt nothing special about this Christmas, like I had no Christmas spirit in me and I would be so frustrated that I couldn't just enjoy the holidays.

Jon and I also decided that we weren't going to do a lot for Christmas, we really don't have the space for more "stuff" and didn't want to spend money on things that we really didn't need. I would go to the store, and see something and think," oh, the girls would love that!" But I would stop myself and say, "the girls would love it, but they don't need it, so I didn't get them anything else.

Every year since we have had kids, we haven't really cared about the cost of Christmas. We would just get whatever we wanted to get and whatever we didn't have money for we would put on the credit card. We didn't want to do that this year, we are trying to pay off our credit cards and our car, we decided we don't need to go in debt for Christmas we just didn't have the money for a lot this year, so we got the girls three things total, and then some socks and little things they needed. I was so worried that they would be disappointed that they didn't get a lot. Jon and I did nothing for ourselves or each other. Actually, we both got each other a $10 gift. But other than that we did nothing.

The week of Christmas arrived, I was overwhelmed. I didn't think I could enjoy Christmas, because there was no way I would have everything ready in a few days, I still had family gifts that needed to be made and bought, laundry to do, a house to clean. How was I going to do it all???

One of my best friends in Jr High and High School, Matt, got married the Friday before Christmas. All of our high school friends were at the reception, and we decided we wanted to get together since our friend Zach was in town. Even though I had so much to do, I took the initiative and planned the get together. My parents were kind enough to let us have it at their house. We had dinner and played the Wii, and it was amazing to have that whole group of friends together again-- minus Matt of course who decided a honeymoon was more important. Anyway, it was like old times. I felt so thankful that I had such wonderful friends and that we are able to keep in touch through blogs and facebook! Everyone brought their kids, and it was fun to be together. Everyone has married fabulous spouses. I think half of them married people we also went to school with, only 3 of us haven't. Anyway, I think that being with all of them helped me to relax and enjoy myself. And I am thankful for all of them and their spouses.

The next day, Jon had to only go to work for a few hours, so he got off at 9:30. I had decided I wanted to make the girls hooded towels for Christmas. As I was looked at the instructions to do it, I got so confused. I have never really sewed that much, and I couldn't figure it out. I had stayed the night at my moms house so I could just do it in her sewing room, but she had gone shopping with my dad and wasn't there to help me. I was so frustrated, and Jon got off work and came to help me out. He showed me exactly how to sew them and then he left to go run errands. I got two of them done and had two to go, when Jon showed back up and said it was taking me too long and he took over and finished sewing. I felt stupid that it was my husband teaching me to sew, then the one who took over the sewing. Oh well, I was grateful for his help. We also got home and his mom had cleaned our house for us. I will be honest, I was frustrated, because I felt like it was my responsibility and she shouldn't do it for us. I was pretty upset, and I called and talked to my sister Stacey and she explained to me that I can't think I am super woman. I sometimes can't do it all and need help and need to accept it. It was difficult, but I was finally okay with it from talking to her.

That night we knew we had to get gifts for my family gift exchange and since the next day was Christmas Eve, we knew we had to go shopping. We put the kids to bed and went to Walmart at Midnight so we didn't have to battle the crowds on Christmas Day. That store was still packed at midnight, but we got our shopping done. We spent Christmas Eve finishing gifts and got everything done miraculously!!

That night we went to my parents for Christmas Eve dinner and we were blessed to get to talk to my brother, Troy, who is serving a mission in the Philippines. I got emotional talking to him because he has an amazing spirit about him. When I talked to him, is when I finally felt the true Christmas spirit. He touched my life through speaking to me and I felt so blessed.

On Christmas morning our girls woke up and were so excited. Kaylee got a bike, Abbie got a doll house, and we got them an Ariel fish tank for their fish Lonnie, that we got from my sisters roomates, and we also got Lonnie a friend that Kaylee named Ariel. That was all the girls got from "Santa" but they loved it. Abbie played with that doll house all day, and we took the bike to my parents house for a straight, flat, street that wasn't covered with ice, and she just got on the bike and started riding it. No training wheels or anything. I was so impressed.

My parents were very generous with us. The little things that I had seen at the stores that I wanted to get the girls but decided not to, my Mom showed up with for the girls. I hadn't said anything to anyone, but she magically knew! I also had told Jon I would like a couple maternity shirts, but we decided not to get any because I have plenty of maternity clothes, and my mom got me a couple of maternity shirts. I just cried when I saw what they had given us. Jon and I hadn't said anything to my mom, but because we were so dedicated to not going into any debt for Christmas we were blessed. I am thankful for my parents and that my mom was guided to the perfect gifts for us!

So, needless to say, even though the holiday season didn't turn out all how I wanted it to, it all worked out in the end. I am thankful for family, I am thankful for my children, most importantly I am thankful for our Savior. What it really came down to was me just focusing on him. Once I changed my attitude and decided all of this wasn't about the gifts or getting everything done, it was about humbling myself and remembering why we were celebrating Christmas and that our Savior and Heavenly Father would just want me to enjoy the company of my loved ones. And those are the things that made and make Christmas special.